In the shadows of legendary coal oven pizzerias, this gas brick oven joint produces imitation New Haven style pies that are not even remotely close to crispy coal-fired pizzas. In fact, the dough is softer & floppier than most wood-fired New Haven style pies. Aesthetically astounding, the beautifully charred crust with seemingly spectacular crisp has the look of a fantastic coal-oven pizza. However, this is a total “Decepticon pie” when it comes to both texture & taste. Flimsy & floppy, with no solid backbone, the dough is ultra soft & texturally inept. Despite the wonderfully blackened char, the crust is not crunchy in the least. Some corn meal or semolina seeds coat the undercarriage but do nothing to prevent moisture or keep the pie firm & sturdy. This is a puzzling pizza; considering the oven is gas-powered, the soft consistency throughout the entire dough & crust is just baffling. The shredded mozzarella cheese blend has a lava-like melty molten flow, smooth & silky with a creamy consistency but the flavor is off. What appears to be a whole milk mozzarella blend, it actually has a melted Polly-O string cheese taste. Similar to the dough, the flavor of the mozz does not match the eye-pleasing texture. Completing the trio of subpar components, the sauce is all bark and no bite. While the volume doesn’t appear to be an issue, the actual flavor is lacking. Neither sweet, nor savory, not even salty, the sauce is an uninspiring dull blend in need of serious seasoning & personality. None of the ingredients are particularly impactful when it comes to taste or texture. Like a beautiful model with no brains, this pizza is all looks & no substance. Structurally unsound with disappointing taste to match, this pie looks dead sexy but falls totally flat, crushing expectations of anything even close to representing quality New Haven pizza.
