Pizza Review
Sally’s is the best clam white pie in New Haven, and anyone who disagrees has a gutter pallet that can’t be trusted to distinguish a fudgsicle from literal dog shit. Out-of-towners may balk when they first see the charred crust, but that is just the ignorance urging you from venting into the mist of the unknown and exploring what is essentially the pizza equivalent of burnt ends. Sally’s is tradition, and a brick oven that has been operating for a near-century cannot be replicated. Fellow pizza connoisseurs, I assure you that no matter what mood you’re in, a Sally’s pie will immediately improve it: - Happy - Stoned - Sobbing uncontrollably for days after a breakup - Shoving a dead hooker into your trunk - Kicking a sick cat - Bullying the elderly - Warding off the dark voices in your head - Mid-afternoon panic attacks in the office bathroom - Stealing your neighbor’s disability checks - Drunk And for God’s sake, its “ah-beetz.” Get that normie “pizza” nonsense outta my face. RUNNER UP PIE: Sausage, peppers, and onions