Dragon Pizza

My fellow Americans, Somerville is, to put it lightly, a shithole. A town with 87 percent of voters registered as democrats is a failing town and Dragon Pizza, is failing pizza with each floppy slice it produces. We made attempts to put a big, beautiful coal oven in this place, but the transgender owner refused. Instead, he cooks his pizzas in what are basically toaster ovens. Sad. What’s even more sad are the undersized shirts he wears. They’re sized for the small boys creeps like him like to groom like the sexual deviant he is. Lock him up, I say! Lock him up! The rumor I heard is that Charlie Redd was the pizza chef on Epstein Island. Your pizza president wants to see the plane manifests to show just how many times this monster tried to push his manpussy to underage kids. Now on to the pizza. Absolutely pathetic. Parmesan permeates the entire place. It smells like Pocahontas underpants. That’s right, that fraud Elizabeth Warren’s rancid crotch smells like spoiled cheese and feet. That’s a fact. No one will sit next to her in the Senate because of the smell. Somerville deserves better pizza and better government.