While the reviews of this pizza are perplexingly polarizing, one thing is certain: this is one of the most unique pies I have ever tried, truly original pizza. This is extremely rare thin crust square style pizza, very bar pie-like, not thick like Sicilian or Detroit style squares. As unique as this pizza looks, the taste is even more original. This is a “whole pie,” which is basically personal size, consisting of 6 total slices and costs a little over $20 with tax & tip…a bit overpriced considering the amount of pizza. While the crust is thin and crispy, the center of the dough is super soft and spongy. The dough is tasty enough but doesn’t have particularly great char on the undercarriage coming from an electric oven. Aside from the solid crunch in the crust, the rest of the dough has a microwaved frozen pizza taste and texture. The cheese is far too thick for such a thin pie, completely blanketing the surface of the pizza. Instead of a shredded blend, the cheese appears to be slices of mozzarella, not a very creamy or melty flow, with a handful of burn bubbles charred atop. Oddly sweet, the flavor of the cheese is incredibly unique, as if it were lightly glazed with honey. Combined with the dough and sauce, the cheese has a taste unlike any pizza cheese I’ve ever eaten. The sauce isn’t super sweet, nor is it too terribly bitter; somewhat savory with a touch of tang, the sauce isn’t particularly spicy but has just enough kick to have a presence to go along with a strange consistency. The texture of the sauce is that of heated ketchup, with fairly bizarre flavor to match. Everything about this pie is atypical and irregular; the taste, texture and style are all uniquely original. I’ve never seen or tried any pizza like this before. Despite a rectangular par pie feel, it has a disappointing frozen pizza taste. They should market this as “SpongeBob SquarePants frozen pizza” cause this is exactly how I imagine that pizza would taste. I’d say it’s worth a try because of its uniqueness but it’s not worth traveling long distances. Portnoy rated this pie in the early days of his New York reviews and backed himself into a corner with his ridiculous score after claiming this pizza would be the best in NYC before even trying it. Polarizing pizza for sure, with high scores clearly influenced by Portnoy’s 9.3 but trust the lower, more rational ratings and manage your expectations.
